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by John Hooper
Getting over your ex is something that most of us have to do at some
point in our life. Some people more than others. When the ex means a
divorce in involved then the break up is all the more harder.
It is said that time is a great
healer and that is true, but also taking action is vital. Just what
action should you take?
Here is some practical advice to
deal with life after a break up, relationship break down or divorce.
1. Make a clean break. As tempting
as it can be, if you are still in love with your EX, and they don't
reciprocate the feelings and intensity, then you're better off
making a clean break. This is true every time. Ex lover rarely make
good friends after a break up.
2. Delete all telephone numbers,
email address and the like that contain your ex’s details. Keeping
temptation at bay is vital.
3. Clear out as many personal items
as you can. Obviously keeping practical stuff is important, but, if
you’re using your ex’s left behind items to remember them, then
that’s no good. Clear them out as soon as possible.
4. Treat yourself. Make sure you
get used to enjoying yourself without your ex partner. Prove to
yourself, your ex and others that you can smile again in spite of
the circumstances. A divorce doesn’t mean you can’t laugh a lot.
5. Let your frustrations, anger and
bitterness come out. Write down your feeling or get some counselling.
Even if it’s just a friend who will listen to you for a while. Blow
off steam – it’s natural.
6. Cleanse your current situation
by buying new things for the house. New bedding and kitchen utensils
are something you use every day. Get new items. Your life is still
going to go on so distance yourself from the things you used with
your ex. It will work wonders for you.
7. Give yourself time to heal. You
don’t need to rush into a new relationship until your ready. Advice
given to me as I was going through my divorce was to ‘clear the
decks emotionally.’ Superb advice, you don’t need to rebound till
its right for you.
8. Eliminate any negative
self-talk. It’s easy to feel sorry for yourself after a break up. It
can help you only for a very short while at the beginning. If you
keep talking yourself down then you’ll find it harder to move on
when the time is right for you.
9. Take charge of your life again.
Make goals. Set yourself challenges. Maybe you always wanted to
abseil or jump from a plane. Maybe learning yoga could be right for
you. The world is your oyster.
10. Take comfort in the fact that
it does get better each day. Say to yourself ‘every day in every way
I’m getting better and better and better.’ It’s true and most people
who have been divorced will tell you that suddenly one day you
realise that the rest of your life can easily be the best of your
life.
About The Author
John Hooper has been through a divorce and has since become an
authorised, fully trained and certified counsellor. His advice has
helped many hundreds of individuals and couples get over difficult
times in their lives. John advice is simple to understand and
implement. John is an author and writes for the popular relationship
advice web site www.getoverher.info.

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